The Emotional Side of Vanlife: Fear, Loneliness, Excitement, and Everything in Between
When most people think of vanlife, they picture winding roads, mountain views, or cozy mornings with coffee in hand. And while that’s part of it, there’s another layer that doesn’t get talked about enough: the emotional journey. Imagine feelings of calm, peace, awe and freedom … but that’s just the surface.
In our recent women’s vanlife Zoom call, we opened up a safe space to talk about what really comes up when you live on the road. What came up was beautiful, raw, and honest.
Fear and Anxiety
Several women shared how fear shows up in unexpected ways — whether it’s anxiety about driving a tough pass, worries about finding safe places to park, or simply the unease of being alone in new surroundings. One woman explained how she manages her anxiety by facing it head-on, while another reminded herself that if countless other cars can make it through a mountain pass, so can she. She chooses to put her anxiety in the passenger’s seat, not the driver’s seat. The thing to remember is, don’t push your anxiety away. Our nervous system enters this fight/flight response in order to keep us safe. Anxiety is a message from our body that tells us to pay attention to the situation. We then have the choice of how to act based on this message. Fear and anxiety is a normal part of vanlife but it doesn’t have to lead the show.
Loneliness and Solitude
Loneliness came up again and again. It can feel heavy at times — especially for those traveling solo. Yet, many also reflected on the power of solitude. One participant shared a favorite quote about learning to sit comfortably alone, which many of us tucked into our hearts: “Being alone has a power that very few people can handle.” The power of being present to everything including sitting with your own emotions can be difficult yet transformational.
Excitement and Empowerment
Despite the challenges, there was so much excitement in the room. Women spoke about the thrill of upcoming trips, the empowerment of proving to themselves (and others) that they can do this, and the joy of embracing an unconventional life without limits. The pull of freedom to do what you want, when you want, with whom you want keeps us out there. There’s something deeply affirming about choosing a path that looks different from what others expect.
Judging Ourselves Too Harshly
Another theme that surfaced was self-judgment: feeling like we “should” plan better, be stronger, or handle things differently. Personally, I “should” on myself a lot. In particular, “I should” exercise more, eat better or not spend so much time on my phone. It was powerful to hear reminders that no one has it all figured out — vanlife is as much about learning and adapting as it is about exploring. Accepting all aspects of ourselves and our situation without judgement leads to more peace and resilience.
Safety, Flexibility, and Community
Practical discussions wove through the emotional ones — from strategies for safe dispersed camping to navigating city parking to handling unexpected encounters at night. What stood out is how much wisdom is shared when women come together and how much lighter things feel when we know we’re not navigating it alone.
Final Reflection
What I took away from this call is that vanlife is a mirror. It reflects back our fears, our resilience, our longing for connection, and our courage to step into something new. Every emotion belongs. Every experience teaches us something.
To the women reading this who are just starting out — if you’re nervous, lonely, or questioning yourself — please know: you are not alone. These feelings are not signs you’re doing it wrong. They’re signs that you’re human, and that you’re alive to the adventure in front of you.
We’ll keep these conversations going in future calls and meetups. If you’d like to join us, I’d love to welcome you into our community.
Until then, remember: Adventure in… so you can adventure on.
With heart,
Amy
One Life Van Life
